Bête

The sky churns somewhere in the crevice of my mind.

Shades of gray distort and smoke my senses. My touch is numbed and my taste buds burn. Crawling towards my reflection the textures and colors fall in thick droplets from the canvas onto the tops of my bare feet. My vision fails me and my chest begins to beat outside itself. A band of percussions locked in by my ribs. My knees buckle and with a distant thud my body hits the cushioned surface beneath me. My numb fingers move and interlock with blades of grass. I struggle to open my eyes but it is as if dozens of tiny hands are holding my lids shut. They are sealed. I turn onto my belly and with fists full of earth I drag myself blindly. There is a weight on the back of me and pressure that cuts my breathing. The percussions begin to drum. I release. Lifelessly I lie face down. Silently. Thoughtless. Blind. Numb. Through my deafness, a muffled groan breaks through. Closer and closer. The air grows thicker, heavier. In my ear its breath ruffles and moves my hair. Crouched over the back of me the large talon twirls my hair while the other claw rests firmly on my exposed shoulder, piercing my skin. My hair is coiled tighter. Yanking my head back and arching my spine inwards causing my chest to arise, into my open mouth it breathes into me a cold, dense breath that taste of bitterness with a sour finish. As it moves past my tongue and down my throat my body tingles and pricks like a waking foot. My eyes shoot open but there is a veil, a glaze that lay between my vision and what is before me. I am tossed onto my back and brought to my feet. Fragilely and wavering I stand face to face with this creature that has preyed on my senses and weakened me. A piercing , shattering scream reverberates through my bones. The blades of grass between my toes and the ones locked underneath my feet disappear into the hard slate-like bathroom floor.  I grow cold. My vision still hazed, the color before me mutes. My eyes grow heavier and heavier. They shut. Suddenly I’m hit with the drumming in my chest and at the same time I’m woken. I stand face to face with myself. A clearer version. A golden version. My sight is sharper. More vibrant. My mouth fills with blood. As it pours past my lips, down my chin and falls heavily onto my breasts, goose bumps form and I shiver. A change has occurred. And now I know…